Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Stage 6: Relapse

I relapsed over the last few days regarding food and drink.

I've relapsed countless times before in my life: felt like crap, hated myself, believed recovery hopeless, yet swore fervently never to relapse again.

This time I don't feel that way.

I feel disappointed, but I also know the change I've created over the last 3 months has been the most real of my life, and it's only just begun.

I don't feel the same extreme urgency and intense passion to stem the tide and swear off these issues again. I don't plan to do these things again mind you, but I KNOW what works now. I've done it, and so I KNOW I can do it again.

I never KNEW, from experience before, because before my change had never been comprehensive, holistic, and driven by what has proven to work.

So, as the Stages of Change say regarding stage 6, Relapse, I now plan to:

Evaluate trigger for relapse: Relapse triggered by not doing necessary daily routines (spiritually, emotionally) while on my road trip thus leaving me unrooted and weakened once I returned.

Reassess motivation and barriers: Motivation is feeling as good as I did this summer: the best I've ever felt in my whole life. Barriers are not taking the necessary daily steps.

Plan stronger coping strategies: I will return to doing the work today, and with help from several resources, will regain traction over the next week. From there I will simply continue to strengthen in all that I do, the same way I was before, and consistently, over time, my abilities to cope, deal, live, love, etc, will all grow amazingly strong.

"When we are sure that we are on the right road there is no need to plan our journey too far ahead. No need to burden ourselves with doubts and fears as to the obstacles that may bar our progress. We cannot take more than one step at a time" - Orison Swett Marden


  1. I, too have been struggling with a lack of progress and a partial relapse. I only call it partial because my life is so busy right now that most of my good habits are out the window, but then so are most of my bad!

    I am going to bookmark this post to remind myself how to find my way back at the end of this crazy time in my life (hopefully about 2 weeks from now!)

  2. LOVE IT! I've been having the same revelations about relapsing. Thank God you've figured it our while you're still young. It's taken me 54 years. :)

    Great plan, and I know this time is different for you. I can tell.

  3. I have been going through the same thing these past two weeks but I'm jumping right back in and moving forward.

    Keep the positive attitude....it makes all the difference!

  4. It's good that you are looking at things in a positive light. Keep it up.

  5. That's just wonderful that you have come to this point. I think it's really a key road to cross - understanding that "relapses" don't have to mean the end of your journey, but rather are part of it!

  6. Sorry to hear you've had a relapse, but it sounds like you know what you need to do to get it sorted, so I'm not worried. Keep looking after yourself, dude.

  7. Thanks for your comment on my post.

    Sorry you had a relapse. I know you will pull out of it. Keep on truckin!

  8. I don't know if there is such thing as good advice on this one... I think you will be fine if you keep going. I hate the word RELAPSE. I have grown to think it is harmful terminology, just because there is so much stigma and mock horror around the thought of "relapsing"... maybe if it were not looked at like the plague it wouldn't be such a thing. I don't know?

  9. Remember it is a process. It takes time to change habits. A lot more time than we think. :) You're doing great.

  10. Shit man everyone falls off the wagon...as you know the jey is how long does it take to get back on. You have been doing great, but you are human.

    Now let's get back to the butt whuppins!

  11. It's really awesome to see the optimism in this. You inspire me every day :)

  12. The first thing that grabbed me was how many times you said, "I will..."

    That's huge when it comes to accomplishing the goals you've set for yourself. Never "hope," "maybe I..."

    Awesome! As you know ~ it's not how many times you fall... it's how many times you get up!

    Keep KNOWING... and everything else will take of itself, one moment at a time.


  13. Also... when you have a second, stop by and visit.


  14. I'm glad I ventured online tonight. Got back from a trip recently, planning on "recovering." I appreciate that quote at the end of your submittal. It helps put it in perspective for me, especially when it helps things not seem so futile.

  15. Sorry to hear about the relapse, but I'm happy to hear that you've recovered from it. I'm also happy to see how open and honest you are about the relapse. I agree with the comment you made on my blog about honesty.

    One of the hardest things about being overweight (other than being overweight) has been the fact that I can no longer hide my issues and shortcomings. I used to keep a lot of stuff to myself, so it's been a real humbling experience for me learning to talk about this stuff. At the same time, I've also learned that the truth does set me free.

    I hope you have a great weekend. Take care.

  16. I don't care that you "relapsed"... this is the time that you STILL NEED TO BE UPDATING ON YOUR WEIGHT. It seems like you stopped because of this. If you fucked up? So what. Keep the messages coming. It will be the best accountability possible. Do it!! Post the update. Fight the urge to fade off into the distance. I am sure that you are being hard on yourself- let it go.